How To House 44 Lizards in Your Underwear


A few weeks ago husbeast and I were in Washington, DC for a conference. Thanks to jet lag I actually woke up nice and early and decided to go to Dunkin Donuts for a coffee. While I was in there I was treated to some nice, hometown displays of affection that commonly pass between would-be patrons and restaurant staff.

A homeless man was waiting inside the doorway of the DD and this did not please the staff there. After a few polite exchanges that resulted in the man having to go, he told the DD staff (in less vague terms) to, “Go suck my [dangly bits].” As if this wasn’t enough, one of the DD staff replied, “Yeah, I’ll go suck it.” None of the other customers in the shop were even fazed. I’m guessing this was a normal morning occurrence.

Yeah, baby. DC. How I soo not missed that, even though it was funny. Germans would never tell you such a thing, no matter how unruly they might feel; it’s just unbelievably impolite, and an inefficient way of expressing one’s grief.

No, Germans, in large, are some of the most polite people I have ever met. And their efficiency is remarkable.They organize everything (you should see our recycling system). This admirable display of efficiency and organization was seen last week in New Zealand as a German man tried to board a plane with 44 lizards in his underwear. Now when I heard this, I thought, “I bet he made sure those lizards were well-organized in that underwear of his!”

When this stuff becomes predictable to me on such a correct scale, I begin to think we have lived here too long now.


One comment

  1. Bummer! I wish I would have known you were coming to town. We could have yarn crawled! Let me know next time you are coming to town. I should be around for a while.

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